This entire weekend I’ve been in a very bad mood. And you know what? It’s ok!!! It ain’t pooping rainbows on my unicorn all the time.
I ate too much candy, I definitely had too much suger, I also ate a lot of fresh fruit and healthy food and I had wine too. I baked a peach strawberry cobbler, a banana bread and a nice zucchini spinach lasagne.
I was submerging in the feeling of feeling sorry for myself. Well not entirely, but definetely a bit. Well not entirely feeling sorry myself, more feeling like shit.
This Saturday I was supposed to do Ironman 70.3 Vichy for charity. But I didn’t! My knee injury wouldn’t let me. I decided to withdraw two months ago and I was feeling OK with that. Because it was the most sensible decision and I was able to defer my registration to Ironman 70.3 Barcalona in May 2020.
But then as the other athletes went to France, went to registration and being all excited. And I started feeling so sad and so dissapointed in myself. I know I get a second chance, I know I will be back so much stronger, but at that moment I wasn’t feeling that. Rationally I could totally make sense of it me not being there. But suddenly I got all the feels and I felt like shit. Like so much shit I just wanted to roll in a little ball hiding under my covers for the entire weekend. But I didn’t. I did what I could, I did what I wanted, I ate what I felt like. And I’m still alive. It felt uncomfortable but that’s OK.
Dissapointments and setbacks are part of life, maybe even part of the plan. It molds us to what we need to become for our big plans and dreams. Will it push you back far? And how will you bounce back? That’s what matters.
After some canceled appointments I had some time to be still and think. Feeling bad feels uncomfortable. We tend to run away from it. We don’t want to feel uncomfortable. But feel it and sit with it a while. Look at it and let it blow away like cloud in the sky. After this bad mood weekend, I will bounce back. But now it’s fucking OK to feel like shit.
When you feel like shit? What are you go to-s to feel better?